Wednesday, October 31, 2007

"Generation Me"

I read a fantastic book this week that was really thought provoking and wanted to share my thoughts. It's called Generation Me and the subtitle for the book is Why Today's Young Americans Are More Confident, Assertive, Entitled--and More Miserable Than Ever Before. The book is by a professor who studies generational differences and includes fabulous pop culture references that rang true to me... from Marlo Thomas's "Free to Be You and Me" celebrating the individual and gender equality to references to Seinfeld or Friends episodes. The book refers to anyone born between 1970-1995 as "GenMe," and shows that the parenting styles of the time (focusing on self esteem and individuals being "special") have raised individuals who were told they could be anything they wanted to be. Interestingly enough, much of this stems from the access to reliable birth control so that many more children were planned and "wanted" than previous generations.

Sounds all good right? Well, there is a huge mismatch between expectations and reality as these kids who have been taught to dream big enter the real world. Not all professions are dream-fulfilling desires but are still essential for society to function. Kids dream of being in the NBA or an actor, yet such few people actually ever attain these positions. Such beliefs also have created a generation of young people who believe every dream is attainable but who aren't prepared to deal with discovering it isn't so.

The author calls for us to "ditch the self-esteem movement" in favor of education programs that encourage empathy and real accomplishment to spare some of us the depression that often occurs when we hit the realities of today's increasingly competitive workplace and. Get rid of the phrases, "You can be anything you want to be" and "Never give up on your dreams." Both statements are totally untrue. You can't be good at everything... no one is. And, sometimes you have to put true desires on hold while you deal with practical matters such as paying the bills and managing unexpected events. It's a Free to Be You and Me world where more 20-year-olds expect – not hope, expect – to make a living as musicians, actors, or artists NOT as lawyers, nurses, accountants, business owners, journalists, teachers, or factory workers. If the world was ready and able to cooperate with that dream!

Generation Me's expectations are highly optimistic: they expect to go to college, to make lots of money, and perhaps even to be famous. Yet this generation enters a world in which college admissions are increasingly competitive, good jobs are hard to find and harder to keep, and basic necessities like housing and health care have skyrocketed in price. This is a time of soaring expectations and crushing realities.... "the gap between what they have and what they want has never been greater."

Here are some of my favorite stats and quotes from the book - good and bad news:

"In the early 1950s, only 12% of teens aged 14 to 16 agreed with the statement 'I am an important person'. By the late 1980s, an incredible 80%, almost seven times as many, claimed they were important".

"Seventy percent of late-1990s high school students expected to work in professional jobs, compared to 42% in the 1960s ... In 1999, teens predicted they would be earning, on average, $75,000 by the age of thirty. The average income of a thirty-year-old that year? $27,000."

"Only 1% to 2% of Americans born before 1915 experienced a major depressive episode during their lifetime, even though they lived through the Great Depression and two world wars. Today the lifetime rate of major depression is ten times higher ... In one 1990s study, 21% of teens aged 15 to 17 had already experienced major depression ...".

"David Mindich, author of Tuned Out: Why Americans under 40 Don't Follow the News, interviewed 18-to-24-year-olds in 2002. He found that 60% could not name a single Supreme Court justice, 48% did not know what Roe vs Wade was, and 62% could not name any of the three countries Bush had identified as the 'Axis of Evil'".

"While only 30% of Americans support gay marriage, 59% of American 18-year-olds do". YEAH!!!!!!!

"Reliable birth control, legalized abortion, and a cultural shift toward parenthood as a choice made us the most wanted generation of children in American history. Television, movies, and school programs have told us we were special from toddlerhood to high school, and we believe it with a fierce self-confidence. Then many people reaching their twenties find that their jobs do not provide the fulfillment and excitement they had anticipated, and that their salary isn't enough to afford even a small house."

Tuesday, October 23, 2007

Missions Accomplished

What a busy week for me with Tyler & Kevin!! I am in heaven having them here and helping them get off to a good start!

Race for the Cure with Wonder Woman (aka Julia)

Shopped for and bought a mattress

Shopped for and bought couches

Shopped for and bought a car

Unpacked storage pod & boxes

Now we can start to have some fun. Tomorrow night is my first experience with America's Next Top Model. And I'm looking forward to wine and girltalk Friday night! The weather is finally nice enough to start hiking again on the weekends.

Just finished reading This I Believe: The Personal Philosophies of Remarkable Men and Women by Jay Allison and Dan Gediman which was a very fun read of personal statements from people ranging from Albert Einstein to Hellen Keller to Colin Powell to Margaret Sanger.

I just realized I have 2 extra vacation days I need to take by December 31st or I will lose them.... any suggestions??

Saturday, October 13, 2007

books tv housing & learning

I have read a bunch of books lately. You know how sometimes you get on a roll?

We wait all summer through bad reruns for a fresh fall TV lineup and here are my favorites so far. New shows have mostly been a disappointment (Cane, Bionic Woman...), but a few with potential are Private Practice, Dirty Sexy Money and Big Shots. And I have to say my favorite is the Women's Murder Club which premiered last night. It's based on the James Patterson books and I really think they picked the perfect actresses to play the roles! And I'm happy to see my old friends in the returning shows: Brothers & Sisters, Heros, Boston Legal, House, and Greys Anatomy! Elizabeth Gilbert, author of Eat Pray Love was just on Oprah last week. It was awesome! I loved that book and it was especially great to see Oprah ask questions about her year of self discovery.

We've been busy helping Kevin and Tyler find a place to live so that Kevin doesn't have to commute from Chandler to his job in North Phoenix. They have signed a lease on a condo in Scottsdale which is absolutely perfect. Great location near old town and totally rennovated so that all the appliances and even the bathtub are brand new! Ty flies in tonight and I'm so excited to welcome her to Arizona! They still need to buy the basics like a bed and a couch but I think they will love their new home.

At work I had a training class this week which was very motivational. Microchip works with Steve Chandler on leadership training. For the class we all read his book 100 Ways To Motivate Others and we were able to have a workshop with him based on work examples. What I really thought was cool is that his philosophy brought together many of the pieces from The Secret's Law of Attraction, things I have read by Martin Seligman on the science of happiness like Authentic Happiness and many other books I have read about optimism and leadership all into one accessable package. His approach is the perfect combination of down to earth and spiritual. He was able to use words like compassion without alienating a room of technology managers. I look forward to reading more of his books, following his blog and someday I totally want to have a mastermind group with some of you! In many ways we already have one - challenging each other to create and implement goals, brainstorm ideas, and support each other with total honesty, respect and compassion!

Friday, October 05, 2007

I'm such a wimp

I had my wisdom teeth removed last Friday. You would have thought I'd been run over by a truck or something. It SUCKED!! I totally underestimated how hard it would be. I really thought it would be a great opportunity to spend quality time with my tivo and catch up on some reading and eat pudding for a few days. For 4 days I really just laid around in pain with my best friend Vicodin and ice-packs to try to reduce the swelling.

Everyone reacts to being "under the weather" differently. For Ben, he gets crabby. For me, I get depressed. I am not a good patient at all. By Monday I really thought I would never be able to eat again. Yes, I have the tendancy to be a little extreme.

My bottom left tooth was wrapped around the "inferior alveolar nerve" that supplies feeling to the lip, teeth and tongue on each side of the mouth. So I'm got nerve dammage - meaning I'm totally numb on the bottom left of my face. Luckily I'm not drooling on myself! This nerve heals slowly so my dr says it may take 6 months to a year before it feels normal. Booo hisss.....

Well, that's what I have been up to. The good news is that I've graduated to eating chips and salsa again so life is good!